What Did America Do To Birdie This Time?
by TheUndertalker33
Summary: AmeCan. Yaoi-ness rated T for language. I accept requests, give me a reason to write! Read and Review please. Canada confesses shit happens. that is all I'm telling you. Enjoy and please tell if there are any mistakes I didn't catch. Selfharm!Canada


_**I don't own Hetalia, or anything, sadly. Yaoi-ness, guy/guy, you have been warned. **_

**What did America do to Bridie this Time?**

**America is here, going on and on about how hard it is to get Arthur. Trust me I know how hard it is to get someone you ove to notice you.**

**"I swear it's like Iggy doesn't realize he's not meant for that frog dude." Alfred kept ranting. "Every time I'm hanging out with Iggy, France is all he talks about! Do you know how sucky that feels? It's like being-"**

**"ENOUGH! I know what it's like , so you can SHUT. THE . FUCK. UP!" I lost it, my rage from the past couple of years arosed. "You either stop talking about England and talk to me about something else, or get the hell out of my house and whine to Tony." Just in case you haven't figured it out yet, I'm in love with Alfred. Him coming over to mock me with what I can never have because his heart belongs to England is painful.**

**"Dude, are you okay?" He questioned.**

**"No. I am not. You put me through hell every fucking day, and I'm done. Alfred you need to get the fuck out of my house now."**

**"But, bro-" That hurt.**

**"No. NOW Alfred!" I don't really feel any better than before. Maybe I should just ignore him until I lose my feelings for him. Then after that, right after that, I'll hang out with him.**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~5 MONTHS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**America's POV**

**Okay I'm done, Matie hasn't talked to me in 5 months, 5 MONTHS! He's my best friend, him ignoring me really hurts. So wether he want to, or not, I am going to go to his house and we are going to talk!**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~CANADA'S HOUSE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**Canada's POV**

**-knock knock-**

**"Just a minute." I wonder who decided to come over. Not many people talk to me. I made my way over to the door.**

**"Hell-" I was cut off by Alfred pushing me aside and entering my house.**

**"Matie we are going to talk wether you want to or not." Al demanded me, rude.**

**"Fine." Please leave, please leave, please leave. PLEASE LEAVE! Why can't he just realize how hard it is to have him near me. Yet he ends knowing exactly how I feel...**

**"Why have you been ignoring me?"**

**"I haven't"**

**"It's been so long I've forgotten what you look like. You always ask me if I want to go to hockey games wit you. I haven't been asked that in 5 months."**

**"But they're off season, and I haven't been ignori-"**

**"Yes you are, you're like my brother. Leaving me to be without you for so long was cruel. Now you won't even give me a reason to why you left. You haven't even responded to my texts, or Iggy's! We are all worried. You don't have the right to ignore everyone that lo-"**

**"Stop," I yelled/whimpered, "Please stop torturing me with all your talk about Arthur. Even something between just me and you, you bring him up. Every time you try to talk to me you mock me. You know that feeling of being stabbed in the heart, it's how I feel right now!" I started to scream, turning red. "You put me through hell and even when I try to stop, your voice is stuck in my head." I can feel my the hot tears streaming down my face. "I can't stand to talk to you anymore, it kills me. All this time I've been ignoring you to try to get you out of my mind, just made it worse. God Damnit Alfred! I love you and have for years. Now that you know, you can leave." I point towards the door. "Get out."**

**He leaves. I said I wanted him to, but why did he have to listen? I wish he would have stayed, but I knew he wouldn't. I'm a freak, a fucking rainbow. I just sit on the bathroom floor, letting the warm blood rush out of my wrists. I do this often. It washes away my emotions, heartache. The feel of the blade slowly passing over my veins, not deep enough to actually slice them, yet. Once my skin breaks, my stress seeps out with the blood. This has been going since I was a little colony. Since Papa France or England didn't do much for me, they never noticed. Only one person has ever found out, Gilbert, Prussia.**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ALFRED AND OTHER NATIONS AT A BAR~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**America's POV**

**I walked over to England, heart racing frantically.**

**"Dude, I need your help." My eyes pleaded for him to help.**

**"What is it America?" He sighed, frustrated.**

**"Mattie just told me he loves me."**

**"What?! What did you tell him?" I looked down, slightly ashamed.**

**"He told me to leave, so I did."**

**"You did what to Birdie?!" Prussia yelled at me, attracting the attention of the other countries in the room.**

**"Mind your own damn buisness, dude." He grabbed me and shoved me up against the wall behind me.**

**"What did you do to Mathew?!"**

**"I left, I didn't do anything!" He put me down.**

**"You probably just killed him, idiot. He cuts and has been for a long time."**

**"And how would you know this?" England asked.**

**"Because I've seen him do it."**

**"And you never thought to tell anyone until now!" England shouted, decieved and hurt.**

**" Yeah, because I promised not to say anyhting. But now he's in danger I had to say it now."**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BACK WITH CANADA~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

**Canada's POV**

**I want it to end, the pain in my chest. He rejected me. He left without a word. He's was so disgusted with me, he didn't have words, not even able to look at me. It hurts so much, I would rather have every single bone in my body crushed, than feel this. Death sounds so sweet right now. Not that anyone would go to my funeral, especially Al. I see the major vein on my wrist and think how easy it would be to penatrate it, and watch as my life bleeds from me. The streams of blood flowing down my arm, it's so nice. I want it to end, and this time I think it will.**

**Third Person POV**

**America burst through Canada's front door, panting. He ran to stop Mattie form doing something stupid.**

**"Mattie?!" he called out, no response. "Mattie, please answer me!" Still nothing. He frantically sprinted throughout the house looking for him. He got to the bathroom, so afraid to open the door. He was so terrified that he would find a bloody and dead Mathew. America reached out and slowly turned the knob. Alfred got the door opened, to his relief, a concious Mathew crying on the floor. He slowly wrapped his arms around him, telling him it would be alright.**

**"It's okay Mattie, I promise, everything will be fine." Alfred whispered into Canada's ear, soothingly.**

**"No it won't! You hate me, think I'm a disgusting person!" Matt sobbed into Al's chest.**

**"If I thought that, then why would I be here?"**

**Mathew began to calm down his tears and breathing. He sighed, still letting the rest of his tears track down his face. Soon enough Matt relaxed into Alfred.**

**"I'm sorry, so, so sorry." Canada tiredly spoke, voice cracking a little.**

**"You don't have a reason to apologize. I'm the one who should apologize. I left you witout a response, without listening to what m heart told me. Matt, I love you and I would love if you were mine." America replied.**

**"R-really? You really want m-me?"**

**"I do and it took me a good slam to the wall to figure it out. I'm sorry I made you cry and hurt yourself."**

**"What do you m-mean slam to a wall?" Canada questioned, curiously, America shruged.**

**"Well Gil, he um, slammed me into a wall when I was talking to England"**

**"Why? And since when have you called Britain England?"**

**"Well just now I guess," rubs the back of his neck, "and because he got mad at me that I just left you alone, because, well you know." Al looks down at athews wrist.**

**"Oh... he told you," it wasn't a question, he knew the answer.**

**"Are you going to cut anmore?"**

**"I'll try, but thanks to you, I don't think I'll need to anymore." Matt smiled sweetly, and happily.**

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~END~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~**

_**Reviews are cool, thanks for reading. Expect a lot more Hetalia stories. I take request, give me a reason to write people!**_


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